K is for Know When to Go and Get Divorced

K is for Know When to Go and Get Divorced

Knowing when to go can be more difficult than it seems. Whether it is a party, when to leave work, or your relationship, knowing when to go and move on is never an easy decision. Divorce is something that no one wants. And most people never think they will get divorced once they are married. But oftentimes, we find ourselves staying long overdue in not ideal relationships. This may be because we want things to work out and may continue to try past the relationship’s expiration date. Or it could be because it is easier not to leave and upend our lives. And sometimes, these may be valid reasons to stay married.
But some relationships do have an expiration date. It is important to know when that is and to make moves to improve your and your partner’s lives. The longer you stay in something that isn’t serving you, the more hurtful and difficult the situation can become for anyone involved.
So, how do you know when it is time to divorce? Every marriage is different, but here are a few signs that it may be time to move on.

No improvement, despite efforts

Many of us let the spark die in our relationships. And there are always going to be hard times within a relationship. But when the hard times start to occur more than the good ones, it may be time to move on. Many of us can try to rebuild and succeed. But if there are no improvements in the relationship despite efforts from both parties, it may be time to end things for good.

Abuse

Whether it be physical, emotional, financial, sexual, or verbal abuse towards you or your children, it is time to get out. There is no reason to stay with an abusive partner, even if they insist or make efforts to change. In this instance, both you and your partner should get help so that you can both move on.

Lack of communication

Communication is key in any relationship, and if you cannot communicate effectively with your partner, it is not a good sign. Luckily, communication can be worked on with a professional therapist. Many successful couples must work on their communication skills regularly. However, if one partner is emotionally shut down and communicating effectively, it can be a sign of a larger problem. Not to mention, the other partner will find it harder and harder to talk with their spouse.

Lack of intimacy

A lack of intimacy in a relationship can mean many things, but if it continues to persist there is definitely a larger, underlying problem within the relationship. Again, this can be worked through with therapy. But sometimes, people may fall out of love with each other and no longer view their spouse as a sexual partner. Intimacy goes beyond sex, but not feeling close to your partner for years and years can wear you down and make things unbearable.

An unforgivable discrepancy

Many spouses can get through discrepancies such as cheating, addiction, or lying about finances or other large matters. But it takes a lot of hard work and a lot of forgiveness. And many of us may never view our partner the same way again if something like this should happen. If something is a deal breaker for you, even if you try to work through it, it is best to let your partner know right away. It may not be an easy decision, but you must be honest with yourself and your spouse if things aren’t going to get better.
Divorce can be messy and difficult and a life-altering event. It is completely normal to want to put it off as long as possible. Especially since you still have some type of love for your partner. But it does you or your family no good to stay in a place that is no longer serving you. Making a difficult decision now can lead to happiness later. Knowing when to go can be the difference between the life you have and the life you want. If you are struggling with this decision, reach out to your therapist or any support system you may have to help aid you in this decision.

Archives

Subscribe to our newsletter and get our free divorce guide, “Divorce Dilemma”.